(H.E.A.T., 2PAC WITH, OUTLAWZ)

The second arrow can manifest as shame ("I'm such a weak person...") anger ("How dare they...!"), guilt ("I don't deserve to..."), rumination ("If only...") or catastrophizing ...

Before discussing performance in a 1:1 meeting, check your empathy first. You want to add value and find out how your direct report feels.

• Does the person you're managing feel invested in your company or team goals?
• Does he/she feel as if you've got his/her back...

“And what else?”

Ask this question more than once. Stanier says he typically asks it at least three times, and rarely more than 5 times. “As a general rule, people ask this question too few times rather than too many,” he says.

This question slows ...